


not for anything

by dinglehorton



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Families of Choice, Fluff, Grief/Mourning, M/M, Panic Attacks, one mention of Gordon but nothing specific, the major character death is a spoiler if you havent seen last weeks episodes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-24
Updated: 2016-10-24
Packaged: 2018-08-24 10:44:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8369266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dinglehorton/pseuds/dinglehorton
Summary: Robert's not sure what he's done wrong this time in her eyes, but he's willing to bet that she's jumped to conclusions and has already begun to blame him for this whole mess. He's distracted though by the pressing need to go back to the lake and retrieve the ring so Aaron has something to wake up to. So he goes, despite her pleading for him to stay with those damn eyes that look so similar to her brother's when he's upset.





	

**Author's Note:**

> a few roblivion snapshots during Aaron's hospital stay.. aka in which i kept trying to write things and could only write drabbles that were 4-5 paragraphs long and didn't want to upload all of them separately so I decided to put them together in some sort of order that made the most sense to me. i hope you like it. i might do one more, but I'm fairly happy with it now as is. 
> 
> for those who haven't seen the episodes from last week, you should probably watch them first before reading, but if you haven't please see the notes at the end for the spoiler/trigger warning about the major character death tag. it's pretty significant to the show and to parts of my story. if there's something else that needs to be tagged, trigger warning wise, PLEASE let me know.

 

 

I.  
It comes as no surprise to find Chas and Liv standing before them. He's thankful that Adam calls Aaron's mum because he wouldn't have been able to do it himself. Robert barely has the strength to hold himself upright now. Their friendship still isn't completely solid, his and Chas' less so, but he feels a sort of bond now with Liv that makes a large part of him want to pull her into his arms and assure her that everything will be okay. But she immediately folds her arms across her chest when she sees Robert standing there soaking wet and cut up.

  
" _Once she puts up her walls up, there's no talking 'em back down," Aaron says once to him after a particularly nasty argument that left Aaron red in the face and Liv stomping her way upstairs. "Ya just gotta let her cool down first. She doesn't really mean it."_

  
_He wanted to say that it looked like she'd meant the words she had said, but he keeps his mouth shut. Robert helps when he can, but he finds it best to let Aaron be the one to parent Liv. In the end, she hadn't meant it, came crawling into their bed early the next morning, her face splotchy with shame and tears as she pressed into Aaron's side and murmured her apologies into his chest, low enough so only Aaron can hear them. She apologizes to him too, once they've all woken up for the day. It's a little half-hearted and sarcastic, but Robert knows she really, truly does mean it._

  
Robert's not sure what he's done wrong this time in her eyes, but he's willing to bet that she's jumped to conclusions and has already begun to blame him for this whole mess.

  
He's distracted though by the pressing need to go back to the lake and retrieve the ring so Aaron has something to wake up to. So he goes, despite her pleading for him to stay with those damn eyes that look so similar to her brother's when he's upset and scared. When Robert returns he finds her angry, biting words that again only serve to remind him of Aaron. Aaron who is a ball of fiery rage packed into one small body when angry, and Liv is the mirror image of Aaron in that regard. He wishes he had known Aaron before when he was a surly teenager because the stories Chas and Paddy have told him don't sound like the Aaron he lays in bed next to every night. He can see inklings of it sometimes, a twinkle in his eyes when they argue, but for the most part, it seems like they're talking about a completely different person.

  
"Hey," Robert says and nudges her knee with the tips of his fingers. She turns her eyes on him, still a little angry but mostly just scared. He motions with his head for her to join him on the couch, but she shakes her head and clutches the jacket she's been holding tightly against her chest. He wishes he could do more, knows that if it was Aaron he'd know how to better handle this. For now, he settles for showing her the ring, silently making her a promise to stand by Aaron no matter what happens. When Liv looks up at him, she's beaming at the ring and at him.

 

 

II.  
Where Chas and Liv are happy for them, Cain and the rest of the Dingles aren't entirely thrilled. News gets around fast in that family, and Robert shames himself for thinking they could keep it quiet for a while longer. _The last thing Aaron needs is stress_ , the doctors had warned him and Chas. That advice went out the window when Cain burst into Aaron's hospital room. He looks relieved to see that Aaron is okay, awake and talking with Chas and Liv, but he looks at Robert and everyone in the room can see his disapproval.

  
They leave Cain to talk with Aaron alone, against Robert's better judgment. Robert stays close by with his back pressed against the opposite wall so he can hear their conversation and watch through the little window. He doesn't mean to eavesdrop, but a part of him is worried that Cain will somehow talk Aaron out of marrying him.

  
"I love him, Cain," Aaron says softly. "You saw how he was with... with Gordon. He coulda ran for the hills, but he stayed even when I told him not to. Robert's saved my life."

  
"If he hurts you--"

  
"I can take care of myself!" Aaron yells in his own defense, groaning in pain when he moves around too much. Robert steps forward intent on kicking Cain out of the room, but before he can push the door open Cain presses a hand to Aaron's shoulder and shushes him softly, softer than he's ever seen Cain act towards anyone.

  
"Okay, okay," Cain repeats over and over. "You're okay. I know you can take care of yourself. I'm just sayin' if Sugden hurts ya he's gonna have me to deal with. I reckon your mum knows about this."

  
Aaron nods and smiles, "Says she's happy with it."

  
"I'll follow her lead, then, yeah? She ain't got good judgment about her own life, but she's pretty good when it comes to you and me, eh?"

  
"Moira?" Aaron asks, his concern immediately rising. Robert doesn't hear Cain's response because he finally ducks away to find out where Chas and Liv had gotten to.

 

 

III.  
Liv is curled up on the couch when Robert returns home to shower and change his clothes. She's sleeping soundly, a textbook splayed open on the floor between the couch and the coffee table. He smiles, fondly, before picking up the book and placing it on the table with her other ones. He carefully picks up the blanket from the back of the couch and gently drapes it over her small frame. When he stands up he sees Chas standing in the doorway, watching him with a look that Robert can’t decipher.

  
"Poor thing barely slept last night," Chas says as she steps into the room. "Heard her tossing around in bed."

  
Robert furrows his eyebrows down at the teenager, worried, "I'll take her back with me after I have a shower. Probably do 'er some good to see Aaron."

  
"Thanks, love," she says and it isn't until she sits down at the kitchen table with a huff that Robert realizes just how tired she looks.

  
"He's gonna be okay," Robert reassures her. "He was laughin' with Vic and Adam when I left 'em and sweet talkin' the nurses for extra puddings."

  
She hums softly, going silent for a moment, and then she says, "You shower. I'll get her ready."

  
When Robert returns, freshly shaven and dressed in one of Aaron's oversized long sleeve t-shirts that is too long in the sleeves even for him, Liv is sulking over half of a sandwich and a cup of tea. She looks as tired as he feels, and he regrets even suggesting that he'd take her with him back to the hospital. _Aaron would probably force her to bed early_ , Robert thinks ruefully. While Aaron was still learning how to parent a teenager and he'd had some struggle with figuring it out, Aaron was miles better at it than Robert.

  
"Come on then," Robert says to her, and she immediately perks up, jumping up from her seat to grab her bag to follow Robert outside. He loops a hand around her wrist, stopping her just short of the car, "Hey."

  
"Wha--"

  
Robert pulls her into a hug, crushing her against his chest, cutting off her questions. At first, she stands there with her arms limp at her side, a little stunned, but when he says, "Been meaning to give ya this earlier" he feels her hands clutch at the back of his jacket and she leans against his chest for support.

  
When he finally pulls away she ducks her head to the ground to hide the tears pooling in her eyes and says, "Thanks," so softly that he barely even hears it.

 

  
IV.  
When Robert left Adam had been sitting by Aaron's bedside, shoes kicked off, and feet propped up on the mattress near Aaron's knees. They had been having a lighthearted conversation, Adam's smile a little more forced than usual, but he was trying to keep Aaron's spirits lifted. When Robert returns with Liv, they find Adam slumped forward, feet firmly planted on the floor, with his head resting on his palms. Aaron's right hand is resting on the back of Adam's neck, thumb sweeping back and forth. He sends Liv for some coffee and some extra pillows and blankets. She huffs at the order, but obliges once she hears Adam's sniffling. Aaron catches Robert's eye when he steps through the doorway, concern etched all across his face.

  
He mouths, "Where's Vic?" and Aaron nods towards a chair against the back wall where his little sister is folded into what looks like an incredibly uncomfortable position on a crappy plastic hospital chair. Adam exhales shakily and Aaron returns his attention to his best friend. He's whispering soft and low, moving the pad of his thumb at the base of Adam's skull. Robert had heard earlier from a nurse that some people had died in the crash, momentarily feeling a wave of relief that it wasn't Aaron or, for Aaron's sake, Paddy.

  
Aaron saw his confusion and sighed, "James."

  
_Adam's biological father_ , Robert's brain supplies and his stomach turns over. He drops a hand down onto Adam's upper back, heavy and warm, and he hopes it's comforting to his brother-in-law. Their relationship was better now that he'd moved out of their house and into Aaron's. It had been like the black clouds had cleared and Robert could finally see why both Aaron and Vic loved him so much.

  
"Hey," Robert says softly and Adam finally lets out the sob that he must have been holding in for a while. " _God, Adam_."

  
Aaron suddenly looks frustrated that he's unable to properly comfort his best friend so Robert pulls Adam up and into a hug for him. They stay like that until Adam laughs into Robert's shoulder. Robert pulls away, patting Adam's back a little bit. Adam nods gratefully in his direction, maybe a little embarrassed by the show of affection.

  
"Didn't tell me he was such a good hugger, bro," Adam directs his comment towards Aaron, who looks insanely proud of the both of them. "Sorry 'bout your shirt, mate."

  
Robert laughs, pulling the fabric away from his torso to examine it, "Don't worry, it's Aaron's."

  
"Oi!" Aaron says, but he's smiling up at two of his favorite people like he's never been happier in his entire life. Vic awakens when Liv enters the room loudly, staring at the three of them like they've all lost their collective minds.

 

  
V.  
There’s a baby crying somewhere, shrieking out in long bursts. It wakes Aaron up and for a moment he forgets that he's laying in a hospital bed, terrified and instinctively reaching out to hold onto Robert, his mum, Liv, Adam, _anyone_. But he's alone in his room now after being surrounded by people all day, and he can't help but start shaking despite the warm blankets piled on top of him.

  
The baby won't stop shrieking for longer than a few seconds and the sound blends with the high-pitched beeping of the machines next to him. They blare in time with the baby for a few seconds before a handful of nurses burst into the room, checking his vitals and asking questions he can't answer because he's struggling to take in any sort of air. He hadn’t even realized that the alarms next to him were going off. Seeing him struggling to breathe, one of the nurses steps forward and takes his hand in hers, her other hand resting on the pulse point at his wrist.

  
Her voice sounds muffled like she's talking to him through a long tunnel, "Aaron, love, you need to breathe. In and out, nice and easy." He takes a shaky breath in and exhales it out in one long puff. She continues to talk him through it, breathing with him until he's doing it on his own. "Good, good."

  
His arm aches, and he lazily looks over to see another nurse fixing the IV he had apparently torn out in a panic.

  
"You've had a panic attack," the nurse who had helped him says, her voice is so comforting and reassuring that he lets the exhaustion take over, ignoring the rest of what she's trying to say to him.

  
When he wakes later, Liv is sat next to his bed, fingers drumming against the mattress next to Aaron's hand as she beats out the tune of the song she's listening to. It's the first time they've been properly alone together since the scare he had after surgery, so he watches her for a few moments. She looks exhausted with deep, dark circles underneath her eyes--the same ones his mum and Robert and Adam had all been sporting as well. Aaron can hear the music, dulled but still thumping loud enough for him to hear the beat of the song. Aaron places his hand over hers, stilling it as she tries to tap out what must be the chorus onto his mattress.

  
"Aaron!" she exclaims, eyes lighting up when he smiles at her. Liv pulls her earbuds out and leans forward to hug him. "Robert said you'd be sleeping a while. Are you okay?"

  
"I am now," he says sincerely. Then, more seriously, "I love ya, y'know. Don't think I say that often enough."

  
"Soft lad," Liv says, but it sounds more affectionate than teasing. "I love you, too."

  
Robert returns then, still looking way too tired for Aaron's liking. He puffs out his chest and says a little irritatedly, "Liv take my fiancé home, get him some food, and make him get some sleep, yeah?"

  
Liv wrinkles her nose, a grin playing at the edge of her lips as she gathers her things, "Maybe a shower. Still smells like pond water."

  
Aaron nods in agreement as Robert leans down to kiss him, "Yes. Shower, food, sleep, kay?"

  
"Can sleep here," Robert grunts out but lets Liv gently pull him towards the door anyway. He smiles fondly at Aaron and then turns his gaze downwards at Liv. He fakes a glare at her and says, "Pushy."

 

 

VI.  
"Where do I go now?" Liv asks softly as if she's almost too afraid to ask. She's never looked so vulnerable and that scares Robert because it's so unlike the Liv he knows and loves. And boy does that word hit him like a ton of bricks. He did care about Lachlan when it suited his endgame but he had never loved the kid, had never grown so attached to having Chrissie's kid constantly hanging around. It feels different with Aaron and Liv. He genuinely wants to do nothing but protect the both of them, to create a future for the three of them. At one point Robert had wanted to ship her back to Sandra and to wipe their hands clean of this troublesome teenager's constant presence in his and Aaron's life. He feels guilty for ever thinking those things now. Now he cares so much for that kid that sometimes it physically hurts; it scares him a little too if he's honest. Now he loves both Aaron _and_  Liv so much that he can't imagine his life without them. And after Chas hugs him for the third time that day, he's starting to think the same about her as well. He shakes his head with the shock of it, smiling to himself when he realizes that maybe Chas flippin' Dingle feels the same way in return if her concern for him was any indication.

  
_Before going home for some food and sleep, Chas had pulled Robert into a bone crushing hug, squeezing him tightly. He expects her to say thank you for the hundredth time, but instead, she sheds a few tears in silence. She kisses his cheek and then moves to say her goodbyes to Aaron as well. Robert doesn't expect the gesture, not in a million years given their history, but he successfully blinks back his own tears until she's left the room. Aaron lets him curl against him on the bed with Robert's nose tucked into his collarbone. It makes Robert miss his mum, Chas' hug does, but more importantly, it makes him feel wanted and loved, something he hadn't truly felt in years from anyone other than Diane and Vic. And Aaron, of course._

  
"Y-You what?" Robert sputters out, staring at Liv in confusion.

  
"With you and Aaron... _y'know_. Where do I go? Chas won't want to keep me around or nothin'."

  
Robert smiles. She had seemed happy about the proposal but she had also seemed a little sad too. He wraps an arm around her shoulders, tucking her into his side as much as he can with an armrest between them, finally understanding her previous mood, and says, "You idiot. You stay with us."

  
"Okay," she says slowly, still a little unsure but she clutches at the fabric of Robert’s shirt as a means of support. She’s shaking when she turns her attention to Aaron.

  
“What if he’s not okay?” she questions, finally letting the tears fall now that they’re alone.

  
“Then you got the Dingles,” he says, pressing a kiss to the top of her head, matter of factly. He's sure of it that they'd take care of her if something ever happened, just like they had with Aaron all those years ago, despite her not having a drop of Dingle blood in her. “And you _always_ got me, okay? But he’s gonna be fine. We’re gonna take him home and pamper him until he's annoyed with us for it."

  
"Shouldn't take long for that," she says, snorting wetly as she wipes the back of her hand across her eyes. When Robert looks down at her she looks so small and completely exhausted, and it breaks his heart. _He should be doing a better job of taking care of her_ , he thinks to himself, not because she's Aaron's kid sister but because her childhood has already been difficult enough.

  
"Sleep, Liv," he says, pressing another kiss to the top of her head. Chas had taken her home at one point for a shower and a fresh pair of clothes and he realizes now that she smells of Aaron's shampoo. He smiles, remembering briefly that when Chas had brought him a change of clothes he finds one of Aaron's shirts tucked inside the bag as well and how just the smell of it made him feel loads better. "I'm not goin' anywhere and neither is he."

  
"Glad you're okay," she says softly, the pull of sleep already clutching at the edges of her brain. Robert thinks she's murmuring that to Aaron at first, but when he tears his eyes away from his fiancé he finds Liv sleepily staring up at him, eyes heavy but warm and sincere. "Need you 'round to keep 'im sane."

  
Robert laughs then, wincing a bit when it jerks his bruised ribs, "Bit hard to do when you're a Dingle. Loads of trouble, he is."

  
"Worth it. Trouble you love," Liv says just as she drifts off to sleep.

  
Robert thinks about Aaron, Liv, and Chas; he thinks about the Dingles and his sister and Adam. He thinks about the last two years and how far they've all come. He thinks about all the things they've gone through together in the past.

  
Liv's right. He wouldn't give it up for anything.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> The major character death is James Barton, but it's touched on only in one instance in relation to Adam. I don't go into specifics or anything too triggery about the death or his particular storyline on the show, but there is some grief on Adam's part. No character tagged in this fic dies or suffers any permanent or too severe injury.


End file.
